BHIF: Had you listened you'd be rich...
Seder in a can. The Atkins diet. OJM Commodities Desk. Gilbert Gottfried. Chicken show. Mao. Aaron. Dave's heritage revealed...the t-shirt market safe haven
Welcome to BHIF for Friday April 11th, 2024. Baruch Hashem (Thank God) It’s Friday is The Old Jewish Men weekly roundup where we get to all the crap that actually matters in the world. Obituary winners. Matchmaking. Market watch. Marketplace finds. Complaint of the week. Joke of the week. You get the picture.
News
For the last six months the OJM commodities desk has encouraged readers to load up on gold. Boy were we right. Had you listened, you’d be rolling in dough, happier than a pig in shit. But it’s not too late! If foreign governments continue to lose faith in US treasuries, there’s no limit to how high gold can go. It’s time to scour the house and any nearby anal cavities for traces of gold to either melt down or put in the safe. It’s go time, baby.
A surprise store of value
Given recent market volatility OJM financial experts are discovering that the only places to store wealth these days are in shiny metals and t-shirts. T-shirts?? You heard us correctly. T-shirts, specifically of the 100% cotton variety have proven to be an excellent store of value. Not only can you re-wash them, they can be folded, ironed and worn again. A slight tear? Oh, that’s just fashion. However you can’t say the same about electronics or real estate. Electronics break and homes flood and go up in flames. Just ask your local Californian. T-shirts are forever…especially if they’re made by OJM.
